I guess I should apologize first, since this subject gets old. Does loving someone mean never giving up on them? Or does it mean being able to let them go? Never giving up...I wonder if that works. I wonder if it means giving up the pursuit. Does it mean to persist until it's been seen?

I had a dream a few days ago. It was pleasant. It was someone I liked. You know that happened? We've all had sketchy dreams. Did you know what this was? Holding hands, brief hug, etc. It was so pleasant and surprisingly simple--that is to say...innocent. I didn't wake up puzzled or disturbed at myself. Instead, I awoke with a sense of loss, it was sad, it was tragic as it always is to dream about things that will never happen. I felt a slight sense of emptiness, like I should have jumped back into that dream world, bask in the happiness that I can't have in real life. It's been a long time since I've taken a walk around school like that. Makes me want to ask now, but busy schedules and hesitation makes it seem improbable. It's slightly agonizing. Sometimes I wish I was able to do more impressive things, I wish my modes of expression weren't such simple everyday tasks. I want so badly to make them happy, sometimes it's frustrating to not be able to do anything outside of what I already do. Does that make sense? Shouldn't I be able to take charge of the impression I want to leave?

I think every time I try to think about it, the problem seems to be the apparent fact that I want something I simply cannot have.