wow

It's been a while since I've felt like I can't express what I want to say to anyone.

So I'm going to be frank. no beating around the bush.

here's the setup, alright?

There are two people, whom I equally consider my best friends. One of them just happen to be dating me. a skirmish of sorts happened between them. A invites a person C that B doesn't like to something we were all going to. A didn't apologize rite away. B finds A pretty insensitive (this is true point #1) but since B wasn't too nice to A's friend (whom B hates), A feels this is rude and feels that even if they are in the wrong for inviting C, B should at least be nice as long as the it has happened (understandable point #1.

A did not do it out of malice (true point #2) but B finds it REALLY offensive and inconsiderate (understandable point #2). B points out to me that A has been inconsiderate about those types of things to both me and B and other people around A for a long time now and that A can't keep acting like a child and have to start taking responsibility for what they do (true point #3, imo).

So. I honestly agree with both of them on several terms, which you can deduce from what I find true and understandable. B shuns A and they are not talking. A has made some effort, but not anything too apologetic because of their insistence that B was also wrong, and that they can't truly apologize unless B sees their wrongness in this whole thing, too (understandable point #3). Oy. This is where the dilemma comes in. Thinking what I think, and them being the meaningful people they are in my life, I can't really choose one over the other without any nagging guilt. Both wants me to choose them because they're right. I give it to them that they are right, but each also has a wrong, which I consider either equal or that A is only slightly more wrong. It's pretty close.

Should I choose A, whom I'm dating, simply because A is who I'm dating and I should feel obliged to support them when B has stopped talking to them? or should I choose B, whom I might think is more right if I really think about it.

The underlying problem here is also that I like both of them. simply put, it's a known preference of mine to choose B over A if I really had a choice of whom I'm most attracted to and feel more of a mental bond toward (however, emotional bond toward A is pretty strong).

So a new problem (outside of the right/wrong problem) is that if I choose B, it feels as if I'm confirming and asserting my preferential attraction toward B over A, which is bad for my relationship with A. I feel like it also cheapens my relationship with A if they end up feeling that the only reason I'm with them is because I can't be with B. To some extent, I guess that could be true if you get to the most shallow and basic part of it, but it's not true if you account for how we've been together for the past 3 years.

Gah. I'm confused already. Is my brain so weak that it can't process all of this? Maybe I should just....become a monk and live the rest of my life in solitude.

the problem is. I don't see why they have to make me choose. it's simple. in a perfect world, the ones in conflict should duke it out, right?

My perfect solution: Both should admit their fault in wronging the other. Both should apologize for said fault while accepting the other's apology. We all go to each a pesto dinner that I make. Seem good? Sounds good to me.