hmmm

I'm so happy for some reason.....So my roommate tried to guess what my "deep dark secret" is....because I guessed hers...Actually, I didn't guess because I didn't want to assume....until she told me to. *sigh* oh stacy....why, why, why....

Anyway, I felt compelled to tell her because I felt....indebted to her, so I let her guess. She didn't get it, though....but she ended up with several unconsolidated things:

"You're afraid of falling in love because you are afraid that it won't be reciprocated and that it would hurt you."
"You're afraid of eventually caring for someone...which means that you love them?"
"You're afraid of abandonment, rejection, and people lying to you about how they feel. That's why you don't trust them."

.........0_o..........

My roommate is listening to White Flag a lot....oh roommie...why? We talked yesterday and I understand why she's so....stuck on it. I still think Neill and I are a lot alike...and if we are...I would like to apologize to everyone who ends up...caring about me. I wouldn't think that it's an easy task. I think last night was one of those talks where I end up deciding that I'm a horrible person >< because I think I'll someday end up doing the same thing he did. I think one day someone will be significant to me, and I would (hopefully) be as significant to them, but then they'd do something that shows the smallest sign of instability or inconsistency and I'll completely leave. The reason? I wouldn't know what else to do.